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1.08.2005
1.06.2005
oh, seriously gloomy today. gloomy weather, too. tomorrow is my last day at the iab, which is fine, but for the nonbonusgetting and the wrap up on projects i don't get to finish that i've been working on. don't get me wrong, i am so, so excited for my new gig, but i can't help but wish things here had turned out a bit differently. at least i'm leaving on my terms, and not on smug's.
smoking a lot today and feeling generally unfit and under the weather. i did run into my friend Louis on the street, which cheered me up a bit, and i'm going to see chantal tonight with karie for wine and cheese. i even made myself a reservation for lunch tomorrow at gramercy tavern, where i've wanted to go for a couple of years. (okay, five.) so what's my malfunction?
i need to get a little more exercise, go out on more dates and stop worrying. right? right??
it's definitely not christmas today.
smoking a lot today and feeling generally unfit and under the weather. i did run into my friend Louis on the street, which cheered me up a bit, and i'm going to see chantal tonight with karie for wine and cheese. i even made myself a reservation for lunch tomorrow at gramercy tavern, where i've wanted to go for a couple of years. (okay, five.) so what's my malfunction?
i need to get a little more exercise, go out on more dates and stop worrying. right? right??
it's definitely not christmas today.
1.04.2005
free download
here's a hot one from chuck prophet: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B000068VC9/ref=j_disp_dwnld_1/102-0507822-0415352?v=glance&s=music&st=digital-music
here's a hot one from chuck prophet: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B000068VC9/ref=j_disp_dwnld_1/102-0507822-0415352?v=glance&s=music&st=digital-music
fails every spelling quiz i ever took...
You are a goddess!
Which Ultimate Beautiful Woman are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are a goddess!
Which Ultimate Beautiful Woman are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
1.03.2005
bitterer
a thread of vinegar
drawn along my throat.
defeats.
i am braids of thoughts:
after all the wine,
i love to want the things that recede.
i hear mother's voice in mine
and i retreat.
the hot gray sky today
meets the open air
and it's welcome cold
after the heat beneath the street.
the city in january
-look both ways-
the lining of my year-old coat
has grown thin, and frays.
I am
not
T.S. Eliot
(toilets)
the people in the market at Union Square
the joy of my books;
paper slices of garlic;
his beautiful face;
the pleasures of logic;
this is my joy to the world.
defeats.
a thread of vinegar
drawn along my throat.
defeats.
i am braids of thoughts:
after all the wine,
i love to want the things that recede.
i hear mother's voice in mine
and i retreat.
the hot gray sky today
meets the open air
and it's welcome cold
after the heat beneath the street.
the city in january
-look both ways-
the lining of my year-old coat
has grown thin, and frays.
I am
not
T.S. Eliot
(toilets)
the people in the market at Union Square
the joy of my books;
paper slices of garlic;
his beautiful face;
the pleasures of logic;
this is my joy to the world.
defeats.
a six-month vacation on Union Square
thank God the holidays are over. now if i can just lose ten pounds by monday... as if.
Day of the Ex Boyfriends.
i got email from both ChriMu and JR and had a few pleasant moments writing them back and catching up. considering what a piece of crap i was to JR, it's a mitzvah that he's kind enough to write to me. on the other hand, Murph's a funny old thing (some of you know him as "EEC") and though we seldom speak, it's nice to hear what he's up to. hell, it's always good to hear that people one dedicated ginormous chunks of your life to are happy and doing well, even if you occasionally wish you could poke them with your And-another-thing finger or rewind the clock and be less of a jerk-off, or not have jumped in with both feet when cautious toes would have been wiser.
that's always it, though. for those of us in-love-with-love types, it's always the ungraceful cannonball, the major lift and the inevitable plunge, or as i think i called it a while back on this blog, the problem of gravity. what comes up must come down. my mom says that when you lost weight, the slower it comes off, the more likely it is to stay off. there's some corollary there to the problem of love.
i'm surely wiser at twenty six (?!?!!) than i was at twenty one, or at seventeen, but i still haven't quite got the thing down where you don't give your heart away in two months or six or whatever, where you remember that the other person has to deserve you, too. that, and that they probably mean 99% of the things they say that you don't like. hysterical.
i suggested that people should have warning labels. like the better business bureau, or standardized personality tests, you should be able to know in advance whether the perfectly lovely human being you sleep with three nights out of seven is ever going to warm up to the idea of a committed relationship, or whether they are Emotionally Unavailable. whether the beautiful girl your best friend is dating is really as charmingly innocent as he believes her to be, or if she is in fact Out Of Her Cotton-Pickin' Mind.
if anyone wants to volunteer information about themselves, shoot. that's what the comments are for and anyway, you can put nice things in, too. like, you could say: "ME!: intelligent, handsome, but extremely squirrelly 32 Y.O. with huge, enormous, dong, and deep-seated commitment issues. neat freak and vegetarian. YOU?: pref. intellectual types with glasses and at least two kinds of sex toys. blondes, over-thirties and type-A personalities need not apply, because i'm kind of insecure." and no crap about how that would take all the fun and mystery out of dating, because seriously, if that's what you think, then you're either fifteen or a Mormon, or both. dating could use a lot more fun and a lot less mystery, and that's a fact.
as for me:
ME: Highly sensual and indulgent Americanized Latina with big round ass seeks extremely masculine smarty-pants with a sense of humor about himself. Highly sentimental, introverted-extrovert, occasionally unreliable, often fickle, easily bored, sci-fi nerd. No metrosexuals!!! YOU: No midgets. No one who does not read whole actual books often. Me... Smoker, drinker, excellent cook. Snores when under the influence of alcohol. Loud. No dummy, but a bit of a space cadet. Rarely bitchy or maliciously insane.
thank God the holidays are over. now if i can just lose ten pounds by monday... as if.
Day of the Ex Boyfriends.
i got email from both ChriMu and JR and had a few pleasant moments writing them back and catching up. considering what a piece of crap i was to JR, it's a mitzvah that he's kind enough to write to me. on the other hand, Murph's a funny old thing (some of you know him as "EEC") and though we seldom speak, it's nice to hear what he's up to. hell, it's always good to hear that people one dedicated ginormous chunks of your life to are happy and doing well, even if you occasionally wish you could poke them with your And-another-thing finger or rewind the clock and be less of a jerk-off, or not have jumped in with both feet when cautious toes would have been wiser.
that's always it, though. for those of us in-love-with-love types, it's always the ungraceful cannonball, the major lift and the inevitable plunge, or as i think i called it a while back on this blog, the problem of gravity. what comes up must come down. my mom says that when you lost weight, the slower it comes off, the more likely it is to stay off. there's some corollary there to the problem of love.
i'm surely wiser at twenty six (?!?!!) than i was at twenty one, or at seventeen, but i still haven't quite got the thing down where you don't give your heart away in two months or six or whatever, where you remember that the other person has to deserve you, too. that, and that they probably mean 99% of the things they say that you don't like. hysterical.
i suggested that people should have warning labels. like the better business bureau, or standardized personality tests, you should be able to know in advance whether the perfectly lovely human being you sleep with three nights out of seven is ever going to warm up to the idea of a committed relationship, or whether they are Emotionally Unavailable. whether the beautiful girl your best friend is dating is really as charmingly innocent as he believes her to be, or if she is in fact Out Of Her Cotton-Pickin' Mind.
if anyone wants to volunteer information about themselves, shoot. that's what the comments are for and anyway, you can put nice things in, too. like, you could say: "ME!: intelligent, handsome, but extremely squirrelly 32 Y.O. with huge, enormous, dong, and deep-seated commitment issues. neat freak and vegetarian. YOU?: pref. intellectual types with glasses and at least two kinds of sex toys. blondes, over-thirties and type-A personalities need not apply, because i'm kind of insecure." and no crap about how that would take all the fun and mystery out of dating, because seriously, if that's what you think, then you're either fifteen or a Mormon, or both. dating could use a lot more fun and a lot less mystery, and that's a fact.
as for me:
ME: Highly sensual and indulgent Americanized Latina with big round ass seeks extremely masculine smarty-pants with a sense of humor about himself. Highly sentimental, introverted-extrovert, occasionally unreliable, often fickle, easily bored, sci-fi nerd. No metrosexuals!!! YOU: No midgets. No one who does not read whole actual books often. Me... Smoker, drinker, excellent cook. Snores when under the influence of alcohol. Loud. No dummy, but a bit of a space cadet. Rarely bitchy or maliciously insane.
12.30.2004
On a more-or-less serious note, last week marked the one-year anniversary of my blog experiment, and I'm darned glad that Mitch gave me the idea, although I believe he mentioned something about a book deal, which - nothing yet. If you're enjoying this and think I should keep it up, then thanks! It's been a pretty great way to waste time at work, and looking back, it's not nearly as nauseating as I was afraid it might be, so that's good. Finally, having jotted down the daily flotsam of one year, it's astonishing to say that my life is a hell of a lot better than it was 372 days ago, and for that I am profoundly grateful to Mitch, Tory, Chantal, Karie, Scott, Elma, Andy, Patrick, Adam, Charlie, Erik, Gustavo, Morgan, Wilcox, Gregory and the many, many nameless boys I shamelessly dated, as well as to the PTBs and to all of you 2900+ other (?) people who've stopped by long enough to read about what Vanessa B. Soto was up to. I hope you've enjoyed it.
Best to all in the New Year - I hope you have the same good fortune as I have had.
Knock on wood...
VanessaIAB: love oo
Yaki Torysan: I love you more
Yaki Torysan: but I'm imaginary
VanessaIAB: ah
VanessaIAB: me too
Yaki Torysan: you're not imaginary
Yaki Torysan: I've bitten you
Yaki Torysan: therefore, you are real
happy girl
12.28.2004
12.23.2004
the happiest little girl in the world
i got the job! starting on january tenth. yessir.
check it out: EyeWonder, Inc.
i got the job! starting on january tenth. yessir.
check it out: EyeWonder, Inc.
Karie: the humanity
Vanessa: meanwhile, how much can i hate on Piper and Linc?!
Karie: lots
Karie: linc
Karie: mailto:???#@$@$
Vanessa: adecyn shai
Karie: oh pleez
Karie: get off it
Vanessa: i think they meant Adison Shea, which is still SO HORRID
Vanessa: but Adecyn?
Vanessa: ADECYN?!
Karie: sounds like a medication
Karie: that i need to take
Vanessa: When my man and I feel like the time is right...
Vanessa: he takes
Vanessa: ADECYN!
Vanessa: bowmpchickiebowmbowmpbooooooooooowmp
Karie: reach for adecyn
Vanessa: Aryxon (ericson)
Vanessa: doom. pure and simple.
Vanessa: humanity?
Vanessa: over.
Vanessa: "New naming rule: If in typing the name out you have to follow it immediately with another version in parentheses, because otherwise no one would have the slightest clue this was supposed to be a name and not Klingon for "Wax my forehead, supple wench," this is a bad, bad, woah bad bad name."
Karie: Non-specified object
Vanessa: we should just start making them up
Karie: Jarrix
Vanessa: Maceiyn
Karie: Myler
Karie: Myrriana
Vanessa: Skeilarck
Vanessa: Callisandrah
Vanessa: Mokol
Karie: Dilyyan
Vanessa: woof
Vanessa: Stancer
Karie: Brekkana
Vanessa: doublewoof
Vanessa: DalaiLynn (Dollie-Lynn)
Vanessa: Kitterin
Vanessa: Bellaireigh
Karie: Styler
Vanessa: Kannahlee
Vanessa: Santanah
Karie: Chresstin
Vanessa: Shassmyn
Vanessa: oooh good one
Karie: Yndyiana
Vanessa: How about Bordelaise and Hollandaise?
Vanessa: Bryarie
Vanessa: how could we forget 'Karieannah'
Karie: oh of curse
Vanessa: ha
Vanessa: nice slip there mein freund
Karie: my pleasure
Karie: Kye
Karie: Midiain
Vanessa: Accquah
Karie: Dyniosinia
Karie: Blyke
Vanessa: GOOD ONE
Vanessa: Riederlee
Vanessa: Mallabue
Vanessa: Bonar Grande lol
Karie: Keokuk
Vanessa: placename
Vanessa: how about
Vanessa: Greeneseigh
Vanessa: oof
Vanessa: Cammellah
Vanessa: Marryster
Karie: Lynch
Vanessa: Brycestarr
Karie: Stoker
Vanessa: good one.
Vanessa: parents? hippies.
Vanessa: Indigogh
Karie: no you know their kids names are always
Karie: Sky
Karie: Tree
Karie: Love
Vanessa: ugh
Karie: Star
Vanessa: if i ever meetsomeone named love
Karie: Aster
Vanessa: I am killing them before they spread their genes
Vanessa: oooh
Vanessa: Astaire
Vanessa: Bennette
Vanessa: Ahlyzybeth
Karie: oohh
Karie: good one
Vanessa: Camberleigh
Vanessa: Pronounced to rhyme with "My parents hated me"
Vanessa: !!!!
Vanessa: GAAAH!
Karie: nice
Vanessa: Xandrah
Vanessa: Bellaise
Karie: Vikthoriea
Vanessa: sheesh gilson you have talent
Vanessa: Parkyr
Vanessa: Handler
Vanessa: Kieleigh
Vanessa: oh! oh! Foyle
Karie: Freighda
Vanessa: Neighceye
Vanessa: that one stinks worse that our fridge
Vanessa: Harlotte
Vanessa: Skippar
Vanessa: oooh
Vanessa: Swimmar?
Karie: drynkar
Vanessa: HARRRR
Vanessa: Hoare
Vanessa: (for a boy, obv.)
Vanessa: Kloey
Karie: Hughston
Vanessa: Hughsten
Vanessa: creepy telepathy! how did we do that?!
12.22.2004
Win a date with me!
Okay boys, here's your chance. I'm 26 and single and by the hand of (entirely just) Karma, I have no date for New Year's Eve. The lucky bachelor who comes up with the best proposal will have the honor of escorting me out on Dec. 31st, complete with fancy dress, make-up, heels and perfume. I promise to imbibe as much alcohol as is seemly and not become too intoxicated to dance, remain vertical or make fun of hipsters and weirdos. To enter, please append a comment to this posting detailing your name, age, vital stats (I'm not going to specify a height/weight ratio, but if you're wider than you are tall, then that's going to enter into the judging), and proposed locales for Auld Lang Syne hijinks. Dinner and dancing infinitely preferred to beer-sodden anything, bonus points for black tie, but seriously, creativity is welcome. On a financial note, it would be nice to have a night on the town without having to split the tab down to the last decimal place. Don't give me any crap about being materialistic here. It's my contest and since I'm the prize, I don't want to end up at Stuckey's. You can learn more about me than you ever wanted to know by reading this blog. If you hate me after that, then, well, keep it to yourself.
If you're know someone who is interested, pass it on. If anyone replies to this, I'll post an update next week with candidates and see what you kids have to say. Email photos (if you want) to marezion@gmail.com.
Judging will not be up to me, as it is widely agreed that I am not fit to make such decisions. I'll leave it up to Chantal or Kare or Enigmiac or maybe all three to decide.
Let the games begin...
12.14.2004
too traif, or not too traif...
Wizard of Earthsea? Sucked.
No writing last night, just a cup of Spicy Chicken flavor Ramen and some Brown Cow Cream Top yogurt (maple flavor) with fresh strawberries and aforementioned white Bordeaux. Not a bad dinner. Also baked some chicken for lunches, although Miss Kare is too Kosher to eat the fruits of my labor. On the other hand, what the heck do I know? I figured organic chicken was good enough for Jesus, or Jehovah or whoever's in charge of her diet...
Kare: actually I don't think Jesus would have eaten your chicken either, my dear...
Kare: don't take it personally
VanessaIAB: bitch.
Kare: I'm just trying to emulate the Holy One...
Kare: trying to be a good Catholic/Jew
VanessaIAB: Jews for Jesus wants YOU!
Kare: don't lump me in with those freaks...
Kare: I'm normal
Kare: NORMAL!
VanessaIAB: what. everrrrr.
VanessaIAB: don't get all up in my nonkosher grill (from which you will not eat chicken...)
Kare: hello?!
VanessaIAB: don't get all 'I'm the Thirteenth Apostle' on me!
VanessaIAB: Church of the Latter-Day Converts?
could this chicken endanger your immortal soul?
SPICY ROAST CHICKEN WITH TOMATOES AND MARJORAM
Marjoram's full flavor does all the work in this incredibly simple recipe. Serve with crusty bread to soak up the delicious juices.
24 ounces cherry tomatoes (about 4 cups), stemmed
1/4 cup olive oil
5 garlic cloves, pressed
1 1/4 teaspoons dried crushed red pepper
2 tablespoons chopped fresh marjoram
4 chicken breast halves with ribs
Preheat oven to 450°F. Toss tomatoes, olive oil, garlic, crushed red pepper, and 1 tablespoon marjoram in large bowl. Place chicken on rimmed baking sheet. Pour tomato mixture over chicken, arranging tomatoes in single layer on sheet around chicken. Sprinkle generously with salt and pepper. Roast until chicken is cooked through and tomatoes are blistered, about 35 minutes. Transfer chicken to plates. Spoon tomatoes and juices over. Sprinkle with remaining 1 tablespoon marjoram.
Makes 4 servings.
Bon Appétit
June 2003
Wizard of Earthsea? Sucked.
No writing last night, just a cup of Spicy Chicken flavor Ramen and some Brown Cow Cream Top yogurt (maple flavor) with fresh strawberries and aforementioned white Bordeaux. Not a bad dinner. Also baked some chicken for lunches, although Miss Kare is too Kosher to eat the fruits of my labor. On the other hand, what the heck do I know? I figured organic chicken was good enough for Jesus, or Jehovah or whoever's in charge of her diet...
Kare: actually I don't think Jesus would have eaten your chicken either, my dear...
Kare: don't take it personally
VanessaIAB: bitch.
Kare: I'm just trying to emulate the Holy One...
Kare: trying to be a good Catholic/Jew
VanessaIAB: Jews for Jesus wants YOU!
Kare: don't lump me in with those freaks...
Kare: I'm normal
Kare: NORMAL!
VanessaIAB: what. everrrrr.
VanessaIAB: don't get all up in my nonkosher grill (from which you will not eat chicken...)
Kare: hello?!
VanessaIAB: don't get all 'I'm the Thirteenth Apostle' on me!
VanessaIAB: Church of the Latter-Day Converts?
could this chicken endanger your immortal soul?
SPICY ROAST CHICKEN WITH TOMATOES AND MARJORAM
Marjoram's full flavor does all the work in this incredibly simple recipe. Serve with crusty bread to soak up the delicious juices.
24 ounces cherry tomatoes (about 4 cups), stemmed
1/4 cup olive oil
5 garlic cloves, pressed
1 1/4 teaspoons dried crushed red pepper
2 tablespoons chopped fresh marjoram
4 chicken breast halves with ribs
Preheat oven to 450°F. Toss tomatoes, olive oil, garlic, crushed red pepper, and 1 tablespoon marjoram in large bowl. Place chicken on rimmed baking sheet. Pour tomato mixture over chicken, arranging tomatoes in single layer on sheet around chicken. Sprinkle generously with salt and pepper. Roast until chicken is cooked through and tomatoes are blistered, about 35 minutes. Transfer chicken to plates. Spoon tomatoes and juices over. Sprinkle with remaining 1 tablespoon marjoram.
Makes 4 servings.
Bon Appétit
June 2003
12.13.2004
megazit, lardybottom, grouch
mercy. i'm gonna flip out and start taking some steps if people don't leave me alone today.
it must be the hormones. either way, if princess fancypants doesn't shut up, he's toast. he keeps doing this thing from the end of Ferris Beuller's Day Off, you know... "chickiechickahhhh mmm bumpbump"
over and over and over. arrgh.
it was a hectic weekend. i'm delighted that steph came, and that i got a lot of work done yesterday, but this is the first minute i've had when i wasn't sleeping to think for a minute. argh. also, i briefly lost my cell phone friday/saturday and then didn't really turn in on until late on sat night. i still haven't checked my messages, so if you called and i didn't answer, my bad, i suck, and i'll get back to you.
i've some poetry here in my head someplace, as soon as i have some mental space to work that out. tonight i'm going home, having a nice glass of white bordeaux and watching Wizard of Earthsea on SciFi. trying not to order mexican, i imagine... maybe i'll be able to write then. was supposed to hang out with enigmiac tonight, but barring some sort of incredible recovery, i just don't think it's going to happen. i am so tired from the last couple of weeks, and no end in sight.
ah yes, and i have an interview at ten am on thursday morning. if i get that job, whoooeee! i am outta here.
so yeah, send some good karma my way folks. crying in the ladies' lavatory is so unprofessional.
mercy. i'm gonna flip out and start taking some steps if people don't leave me alone today.
it must be the hormones. either way, if princess fancypants doesn't shut up, he's toast. he keeps doing this thing from the end of Ferris Beuller's Day Off, you know... "chickiechickahhhh mmm bumpbump"
over and over and over. arrgh.
it was a hectic weekend. i'm delighted that steph came, and that i got a lot of work done yesterday, but this is the first minute i've had when i wasn't sleeping to think for a minute. argh. also, i briefly lost my cell phone friday/saturday and then didn't really turn in on until late on sat night. i still haven't checked my messages, so if you called and i didn't answer, my bad, i suck, and i'll get back to you.
i've some poetry here in my head someplace, as soon as i have some mental space to work that out. tonight i'm going home, having a nice glass of white bordeaux and watching Wizard of Earthsea on SciFi. trying not to order mexican, i imagine... maybe i'll be able to write then. was supposed to hang out with enigmiac tonight, but barring some sort of incredible recovery, i just don't think it's going to happen. i am so tired from the last couple of weeks, and no end in sight.
ah yes, and i have an interview at ten am on thursday morning. if i get that job, whoooeee! i am outta here.
so yeah, send some good karma my way folks. crying in the ladies' lavatory is so unprofessional.
i wish i was here:
ohh, mexico.
