you know who you are:

don't worry, i think i'll probably not get felled like a fragile young birch sapling by a runaway bus, crossfire from illicit mafiose Russian wholesale cigarette dealers, treesharks, the black plague, cancer of the bones, unhinged exboyfriends banding together on drug-induced rampage, raging fire started by spiritualist-recommended eternal flame karma-candle, massive stroke as brain tries to escape from the monotony of *company name deleted due to wage paranoia* by exploding from my skull and hopping away under it's own power, skin failure, electric eel attack whilst sitting on toilet, injudicious slip of the tongue during interface negotiations with TechnoCore A.I.

did i mention i love you?
cheer up, buttercup.