not for beginners, not for the squeamish, and also, not for my mom

ye gods. i know that RedEnvelope.com sucks and is totally impersonal and basically the Patrick Bateman of online shopping sites, but this year they've really outdone themselves.
i don't know about you kids, but i'm pretty sure that my mother would just about die laughing if i got her this:

"Shiitake Mushroom Log

Also known as the Chinese black mushroom, shiitakes are loved by gourmets for their firm texture and distinctive flavor. Now the search for this exotic ingredient will end in their own kitchen. When placed in a cool, dark place and sprayed with water, the log yields a crop of shiitakes in just 10 days—and keeps on producing every 8-12 weeks for years to come. Recipes included. Arrives with its own ceramic tray which measures 7 1/2" in diameter. Log measures approximately 3 1/2" x 10" high. We regret that we cannot ship this item to California or Hawaii. Exclusively from RedEnvelope. "